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When I did the blog on balancing life, I was asked how come I was before everyone else in my life excepting God. The simple answer is if you are not your main focus then you can’t take care of anyone else. You have to take care of you before you can properly take care of others. It’s the truth. You are not being selfish, but ensuring your health and wellbeing will make the difference for all other persons in your life.

When you get on a plane they let you know if anything happens and you need oxygen it will be there and you should put your mask on first. Notice that you should take care of yourself first before putting on others masks, including your children. If you don’t take care of you first you can’t take care of anybody else.

It’s always expected that women will put themselves last on the totem pole and ensure everybody else is great, but I realized that it didn’t work as very often they would be tired, frustrated and overwhelmed. It’s not a pretty feeling. So I had to unlearn what I had learnt and what was expected. It wasn’t easy as it was seen as the norm by all the women in my life. If anyone went against the grain they were seen as selfish and didn’t care about their family.

Women need to get to know themselves and spend time with themselves. I will always recommend that path. Slow down and spend a little time by yourself, whether at night or early in the morning, do it before or after the chaos called daily life. If not you will always be moving to the beat of others and never your own.

Do you notice how many women give up their careers or give up having a family as it’s just seen as too much to do both. The statistics are there to show this atrocity. The focus is on work or family but no balance. There should never have to be a choice if you want to do it all, but you have to learn how to walk the tight rope very carefully. Men don’t have that issue as the expectations are nothing remotely close. If you have a partner that understands and works with you be grateful.

Let me know what you think. Is this what you do as a woman, or are you just keeping your head above water? As a man, are you seeing the women in your life struggle? If so how can you help?

See you next Wednesday at 8:00 pm.

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